For Mothers

No more Kisses for Auntie! | Why Children’s Consent Matters

Teaching children about consent has become more important than ever. Consent is about allowing children to voice their emotions and say “no,” when something feels wrong or uncomfortable. It is a crucial part of their safety, and of our responsibility as parents, and yet within our communities we don’t talk about it enough.

The explosion of the #metoo movement is enough evidence that we need to actively start teaching consent to our children; not when they hit puberty, but as early as two years of age.

Teaching children consent at home. child safety, me too

This blogpost contains affiliate links. Please see Disclaimer for more information.

It may sound like a complex concept, but some practices if made a part of daily life, can easily instill this value in your child.

Before they even learn to speak, children are learning by observing and copying all that is happening in their environment. It is essential that we ‘model’ consent by practicing it with our spouses, friends, and other children around them, so they begin to understand what ‘consent’ looks like. 

When they are two, start with giving them a choice in expressing consent and then honour it. Please remember, they only get a choice in situations that don’t involve any health or safety hazards. Sitting in a car seat, going for a vaccination, adhering to their bedtime, or wearing a jacket when it’s two degrees outside would be some of the examples. 

Image: http://www.elisegravel.com

Some choices they can make

“Do you want to wear starry PJs tonight or these dino ones?”

“Which book are we reading; Elmer the elephant or The Very Hungry Caterpillar?”

“Can I kiss you goodnight?” Respect their answer.

Model consent by asking permission before you change their clothes or wash their body in the shower. Wait for them to say yes before you proceed. 

“Can I help you wash your back now?”

Allowing Children to say NO!

Children must understand that ‘No’ and ‘Stop’ are important words, to be honoured at all times. 

If you are tickling them and they scream “Stop, stop” even as they’re laughing and having fun, stop tickling them immediately. 

Encourage your children to ask for permission before touching, hugging or showing any kind of physical affection. 

Teaching children consent

For example, if Maha wants to hug her friend goobye, you can say:

“Maha, let’s ask Ali if he wants a hug right now!”

If Ali clearly says ‘No’, or does not say ‘Yes’, you can cheerfully ask your child to wave goodbye instead. 

“That’s okay, let’s wave bye bye to Ali!”

Similarly, do not force them to receive affection either, even from their aunts or uncles. 

“Would you like to kiss Aunty Asiya goodbye?”

If they say no, respect their choice. 

“Its ok, you can wave her goodbye, or blow her a kiss?”

Why Children’s Consent Matters

As we aim for a more inclusive world, we have to remember that there are individuals amongst us with additional needs, who may not be comfortable with any kind of physical contact at all. This is another reason why asking for permission before touching or hugging someone is so important. 

We must teach our children that when somebody says No, or Stop, they must discontinue their behavior. 

“Ali said no, and when we hear No, we must stop what we are doing immediately. No matter what.”

Also tell them that their No and Stop has to be respected and followed through by their friends. 

“If you don’t like something and say No, your friend should stop. If they do not stop, it is okay to not play with them anymore.”

Intervene on their behalf if you have to and politely let the other child know the importance of honouring someone’s No and Stop.

Resources about Children Consent

Reading a book about Consent also helps in making this concept easier and simpler for children to understand. It also gives you a range of characters and situations to talk about as examples. No Means No! by Janeen Sanders is a great book about Consent that can be read with as little as 3 year olds!

Image result for no means no book

Teaching Consent has to be an ongoing dialogue with your child, not just a one time discussion.

I hope this article helps parents and caregivers ease in to this discussion with their little ones. I will highly recommend printing the above poster from http://www.elisegravel.com and pasting it on your child’s bedroom wall or door, so it’s always visible to revise and reinforce.

If you hit any roadblocks, or need answers to any questions or confusions, please feel free to write to me or leave them in the comments below.

Author Bio:

Rafia Amber is an Early Intervention Specialist with seven years of experience working with children with additional challenges. Throughout her career she has supported children in developing their academic, sensory, social and communication skills, and overcoming challenging behaviours.  Her experience ranges from one-on-one sessions in the home environment to classroom settings in inclusive schools and early intervention centers. 

Rafia has recently started blogging onInstagram to share her expertise with parents and caregivers. She aims to raise awareness about unconventional concepts such as Body Privacy, Consent, Safe/Unsafe touch, Abuse Prevention Strategies etc, that are indispensable for a child’s development. You can follow her HERE!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?tap_a=42307-3a677f&tap_s=411756-91095a&v=65k41TkdTAI

LIVE Q&As + Big Announcement!

Raising mums podcast

This week, I was on the Our Muslim Homeschool Facebook and Instagram page answering your questions LIVE!

I answer questions about:

  • Daily Routines
  • Healthy meal ideas
  • After school activities at home
  • Teaching children about the Islamic Heros
  • Coping with mess
  • Feeling overwhelmed

This blogpost contains affiliate links. Please see disclaimer for more information.

Big Announcement

In this LIVE broadcast, I also made a BIG ANNOUNCEMENT. If you don’t want to spoil the suprise, stop scrolling and watch the video now!

So, here’s the news….

Firstly, these LIVE weekly shows have been given a new name, “Raising Mums”. I chose this name as it reflected my ambition for this show….

A live weekly broadcast that inspires mums to live with purpose and intention, to raise their children mindfully, and empowers mothers everywhere to own their lives and to thrive doing it!

Dr Gemma Elizabeth – Raising Mums

And even BIGGER NEWS!….you can now listen to Raising Mums as a podcast!

Raising Mums Podcast launch
Listen to the New Podcast: Raising Mums!

Podcast Launch

Yes, that’s right! Wherever you listen to your podcasts, you can head over there now, and Subscribe to Raising Mums!

You can listen to these broadcasts whilst you’re commuting to work, cleaning the house, working out, or driving the car! The great thing about podcasts, is that you can “grow on the go”, and learning whilst doing other things! Perfect for busy mums…right?!?!

Please had over to iTunes, Apple podcasts and Spotify, and leave a review for “Raising Mums” so other mums, like you, can find it!

You can also simply play the podcast directly from my website! Try it now…

And as always, you can watch the replay of this LIVE broadcast on Youtube. Just click on the link below!

Watch this Video!

Homeschool Resources Mentioned

Subscribe to “Raising Mums” on iTunes

Read Aloud Family

Ayat Jamilah

Mirage audiobooks

Ghazali Children

Al Ghazali by Demi

How to run your home like a boss Part 1

How to run your home like a boss- Part 2

Meal planning app – 30 Day FREE Trial

Add me as a friend on Plan to Eat using email: Ourmuslimhomeschool@gmail.com

If you missed last week’s video: Run your home like a BOSS! – Part 2 just CLICK HERE!

This episode marks the end of Season 1 of Raising Mums. It’s been an incredible few months, and I’m so grateful for all the lessons I’ve learnt during this time and the people I’ve come to know through it.

I’ll be back Sunday 24th March 2019 at 10am GMT on Facebook and Instagram LIVE for the launch of Season 2. insha’Allah

I’ve got some great content planned for you! I hope I’ll see you then!

Peace and Love,

Living history curriculum islamic

Dr Gemma Elizabeth

Run your Home like a Boss | Part 2 + FREE Planner

Run your home like a boss + free planner

Running your home like a boss is a way that homeschool mums can free up their time and energy. Whether it’s the desire for more time to read aloud to their children, or the energy to play football in the garden, time management is the way to achieve it.

If you are looking to take ownership for your time and energy, and live a life of more meaning and purpose, you’ll want to WATCH THIS VIDEO!

I’ve also made a FREE Home Management Planner for you, which you can find towards the end of this blog-post.

This blog-post contains affiliate links. Please see Disclaimer for more information.

WATCH THIS VIDEO!

Home Management Resources Mentioned:

Run your Home like a BOSS! PART 1 – Last week’s video

How Super-Mums do it ALL! Time Management Video

Google Calendar

Meal Planning App – 30-day FREE Trial

FREE Boss Mum Planner

As I showed you in the video, you can download and print out your very own Home Management Planner here!

It’s FREE! I don’t even want your email address!

Just click on the link below:

Boss Mum Home management planner

Running your home “like a boss” is really all about owning your time and energy, taking responsibility for it, and using them wisely.

I’ll be LIVE again next week, at 10am GMT, Sunday 3rd February, on Facebook and Instagram for a:

“LIVE Q&A Session!”

If you have a question about homeschooling, motherhood, home-management, blogging or something else, now’s your chance to ask!

The “call for questions” will be published on my Instagram and Facebook pages on Thursday 31st January, where you can leave your questions.

Although it is not always possible to get through all the questions, I will do my best insha’Allah!

If you’d prefer to leave a question anonymously, please submit it in the box below, giving as much detail as possible:

Submit a question

Thank you for tuning in. Please let me know how you are progressing, and what steps you are taking to move forward in this area, in comments below.

I’d love to hear from you.

Peace and Love,

Living history curriculum islamic

Run your Home like a BOSS!

Run your home like a BOSS!

This week I was LIVE on Facebook and Instagram talking about home management for mums and how they can run your home like a BOSS!

Do you find yourself saying, ” I wish I could, but I don’t have time?” Do you want more time and energy to do what is important to you. Do you want more time to connect with your children? Do you want higher energy levels to play and read to them?

Then you’ll want to Watch this Video! all about home management for Mums!

In this video I talk about:

  • Taking ownership and responsibility for your situation
  • How running your home well can save you time and energy
  • Why busyness is a trap and a distraction
  • Thinking Big
  • Automating household purchases
  • Meal-planning the “right” way!

This blog post contains affiliate links. Please seen Disclaimer for more information.

These are real, tangible steps you can do today, to make a huge impact on the way your home runs.

These simple steps will free up more of your time and energy to invest into what matters to you the most!

WATCH THIS VIDEO!


Home Management Products:

Amazon Prime FREE TRIAL UK USA

Google Calendar 

Present over Perfect by Shauna Niequist

Ramadan Meal Planning

Plan to Eat – Meal planning app. Get 30-day FREE Trial HERE!

Now you know the steps you can take to go forwards insha’Allah.

Now its up to you. I hope with all my heart that you use this as an opportunity to really take ownership and responsibility for your time, energy and ultimately your life. This is where you can start! Use this as a chance to make those positive changes that you and your family need.

Thank you so much for tuning in.

I’ll be LIVE again next week, at 10am GMT, Sunday 27th January, on Facebook and Instagram where we’ll be continuing this discussion on home management for mums with:

“Run your home like a BOSS Part 2- Taking it to the next level!” 

I’ll see you there!

If you have any further questions, or ideas for future lives broadcasts, please leave them for me in the comments below.

Peace and Love,

Run your Home like a Boss!

How to Homeschool with a Baby + GIVEAWAY

Homeschooling with a baby brings with it many challenges. I often hear from women who are struggling to homeschool their children, whilst also caring for a small baby. They are overridden with guilt and with feelings of failure. They want to be a good mum, to all their children, but they just don’t know what the right thing to do is.

If you have a baby or a small child at home, you’ll want to watch this video!

This blogpost includes affiliate links. Please see Disclaimer for more information.

This is a recording of a LIVE broadcast from Facebook where I spoke about homeschooling with a baby.

We talked about:

  • What are the most important things to focus on during this time
  • Alternatives to what learning can look like for your children
  • Encouraging independence and the value of experience
  • Loads of useful resources for busy mums

WATCH THIS VIDEO:

Homeschool Products Mentioned:

Amazon Prime Video

Fire Stick

Reading Eggs

Math Seeds

CTC Math

Khan Academy

Mystery Science

Toxic Childhood by Sue Palmer

Time Magazine Article about audiobooks

Audible – Trial and FREE AUDIOBOOK UK |USA

Seerah Audio Series – 15% OFF Discount Code: OMHomeschool15

Librovox

Lit2GO

Toucan Box – Isa box FREE with code: GEMMA-9E6X

Kiwi Crate – 30% off your 1st order with code: SHARE30

Homeschool GIVEAWAY

I’m giving away 4 activity boxes from Toucan Box to 1 winner!

This giveaway is open worldwide. If you are under the age of 18, please seek parental permission before entering.

If you would like to enter, all you need to do is share this video or blogpost on social media and tag me in the post. Easy as that!

The winner will be chosen at random and announced on next week’s LIVE broadcast. (Sunday 20th January 2019, 10am GMT)

Next week, Sunday 20th January, I’ll be LIVE again at 10am GMT on Facebook and Instagram, where we’ll be talking about how to “Run your home like a boss!”

If you missed last week’s discussion on, “Sustainable Homeschooling | Securing your homeschool for the future,CLICK HERE

All the previous episodes have been uploaded here on my blog. Just CLICK HERE and scroll through them all!

If you never want to miss an episode, you’ll want to subscribe to our mailing list. Then, whenever an episode is published, you’ll get it straight to your inbox!

If you have any further questions around this topic, please leave them for me in the comments below.

Peace and Love,

Living history curriculum islamic

Sustainable Homeschooling | Secure your Homeschool for the Future

This week I was LIVE on Facebook and Instagram talking about some of the ways you can ensure you’ll be homeschooling for many more years to come insha’Allah.

I’m speaking to the mum who wants to homeschool, and is planning and preparing for this new adventure.

I’m talking to mum who homeschools now, but feels disheartened. Who feels that it’s not going the way she thought it would, and she feels like she’s failing.

I’m talking to everyone who homeschools sharing my nuggets of wisdom as to how you can continue to homeschool for many years. There are things we can do in our lives, to make homeschooling a sustainable, longterm experience for us.

WATCH THIS VIDEO!

Next week, Sunday 13th January 2019 at 10am, I’ll be back on Instagram and Facebook LIVE discussing, “Homeschool Under Threat| Homeschooling with a baby.”

I hope I’ll see you there!

Previous LIVES Mentioned

“I’m just a mum, is that enough?” – CLICK HERE.

“Preparing your homeschool for the New Year.” CLICK HERE

If you have any more questions, feel free to leave me a comment down below.

Peace and Love,

Dr Gemma Elizabeth

I’m Just a Mum…Is that Enough?

I'm Just a Mum...Is that Enough?

This week I was LIVE on the Our Muslim Homeschool Instagram and Facebook accounts talking about a topic very common in mothers, low self-esteem. Do you ever refer to yourself as “Just a Mum?” Then this broadcast is for you!

We talked about:

  • Blame
  • My personal experience with self-doubt
  • 5 Steps to Increasing Your Feelings of Self-worth
  • Mothers with low self-esteem raise children with low self-esteem
  • Q&As

In this episode I spoke from the heart about my experience and gave my sincere advice to any mother who suffers with self-esteem issues.

These 5 steps will increase your self-esteem, so that you don’t say anymore, “I’m a just a mum.”

Instead you’ll say, “I’m a stay at home mum and it’s the best thing that could ever have happened to me!”

Here it is! Enjoy!

WATCH THIS VIDEO!

Products Mentioned:

Positive Affirmations for Mums

Next Week’s Episode:

You can join me LIVE next Sunday, 6th January 2019, at 10am GMT where we’ll be talking about:

“Built to Last – Securing Your Homeschool for the Future”

Make sure to follow me on Instagram or Facebook so you watch LIVE!

Did you miss a previous episode? Don’t worry, you can watch ALL previous here on my blog. Just CLICK HERE for the round-up. Alternatively you can watch them our the YouTube Playlist .

If you have any questions, please leave them for me in the comments below. See you next Sunday insha’Allah.

Peace and Love,

Living history curriculum islamic

LIVE Broadcasts | Episodes 1-6 |

LIVE Muslim homeschool chat

Assalaamu alaykum! Hi friends!

If you’ve missed the recent LIVE broadcasts that I’ve been hosting every week on Instagram and Facebook, HERE THEY ARE!

Grab yourself a cup of chai, get comfy and enjoy! 🙌


Episode #1: Finding Confidence in Homeschooling

Episode #2: How Super-mums do it ALL! + FREE Planner

Episode #3: Preschool Learning at Home + FREE Early Years Guide 

Episode #4: Time Management and Productivity 

Episode #5: Motherhood Getting you down? …Try THIS!

Episode #6: Live Q&As Session


The next broadcast will be on Sunday 30th December 10am GMT, insha’Allah.
The title of that discussion will be,
“I’m just a mum, is that enough?” 🤔💝
I hope I’ll see you there!

LIVE Muslim homeschool chat

Peace and Love,

Living history curriculum islamic

LIVE Q & As | Homeschooling, mum guilt, reading & evil eye!

This week on the Our Muslim Homeschool Instagram  account, I was LIVE answering your questions.

We talked about:

  • Keeping children motivated
  • Evil eye and envy
  • Dealing with mum guilt
  • Learning to read
  • My conversion to Islam
  • and a lot more!

It’s a great episode! I’m sure you’re going love it!

Here it is!

WATCH THIS VIDEO!

Products mentioned (aff.):

Ordinary Guide to Teaching Reading: https://amzn.to/2QMg6jh

Bobs Books: https://amzn.to/2QmrT8y

Oxford Reading Tree: https://amzn.to/2PvDMn7


If you missed Last week’s LIVE Video: When motherhood gets you down….Try this! :

CLICK HERE


The next LIVE broadcast will be on Sunday 30th December 2018 at 10am GMT insha’Allah, where we’ll be discussing, “I’m just a mum. Is that enough?”

Make sure you follow me on Instagram so you can watch LIVE! 

I hope I’ll see you there!

Peace and Love,

Living history curriculum islamic

Motherhood getting you down? Try This! + FREE Printable

Motherhood getting you down, try this!

This week on the Our Muslim Homeschool Instagram  account, I was LIVE chatting about, When Motherhood gets you down…Try This!

We talked about:

  • Different types of happiness
  • The importance of seeing progress in your life
  • Why we feel we “Lose ourselves” as mothers
  • The power of gratitude

So here it is!

WATCH THIS VIDEO!

To keep you motivated, I’ve made you a FREE PRINTABLE! It is the famous quote from C.S.Lewis,

“Isn’t it funny how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back everything is different?” – C. S. Lewis

C S Lewis Isn't it funny

We spoke about this quote, and it’s relevance to us, in the video above. Now you can download this cute printable, set it as your screen-saver, pin to your fridge or keep in your planner to motivate, inspire and serve you.

CLICK HERE: FREE PRINTABLE


If you missed Last week’s LIVE Video: Time Management and Productivity: CLICK HERE

Make sure you follow me on Instagram so you can watch next week’s video LIVE on Sunday 9th December 2018 at 10am GMT.

We’ll be do a LIVE Q&A session!

I hope I’ll see you there!

Peace and Love,

Living history curriculum islamic

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